I want to break free

Sal syndrome is coming again
I am enchanted by his spell
I am no longer mine
No matter how hard i try to move on
It is always him
All the time
God knows how hard i tried to forget him
But dear me just love to judge
No one can compare him
The history that we had together
The sadness, the broken heart from him
All this memories
Help me please
I want to have my own life
Without thinking how sal thinks
Sal is not even mine
Let alone he cares what i think
But he is someone that control me
And i do not know how to be free

Sal, stop please.

No matter how desperate i want to try something to, i just have to accept the fact that my world revolves around him. I feel sired to him. Enchanted like a magic spell, when i want to step further with other guys, i always withdraw. Do i love him so much and have to rely on him for the rest of my life?

The One I'm Looking For

I wasn't expecting to meet him again. Stay in front of me, reading a book. But most of all, he's real. It all started three months ago, when i was in the interview with him. He was in my interview group and looked so confident. I knew from the look that i'm not going to forget this face but shame on me, his name was forgotten. Except his name, everything that i can see about him during the interview is still fresh. His confidence, his leadership and his attitude were memorable.

It was late at night. The interview already finished a few hours ago. Somehow, the memory of the short meeting with him seemed so clear. It continued day by day and i knew it wasn't normal. I knew i already fell for him. Albeit, it was too late with the most important information to find him was lost by time. His name, i kept wondering how it could be flushed from my memory without my conscience. I had given up because it really does not make sense to love a person without a name. I was in despair, waiting for a miracle to happen.

It was in late may, the interview result was out. Thank God, i passed the interview! However, i was also offered to enroll into another institute. I was in dilemma to choose the best institute for me. So, i tried my luck to study at the latter one. Despite the institute is near my house, i find it was so hard to fit in. I was almost isolated, something wrong with my registration etcetra. It was like, i wasn't meant to be there. Therefore, i performed solah istikharah thrice to find the most clear answer. My prayer was heard. I decided to come to intec, in spite of the distance from my hometown and the high cost of living. It was easy to blend in with people and the orientation seemed fun to me.

Suddenly, i saw someone who looked so familiar to me. Although he wore a completely different attire than i first met him, i knew just by a glance. He was the person i'm looking for all this time and deep down i said, "Miracles do happen. I found you."